As we near the end of the year, some questions are alive for me and I share them with you, along with some insights from a trip this week to a clothing-optional hot springs.
We explore the themes of letting go, having conversations with our pain, and how embracing uncomfortable spaces can expand us.
And if you'd like to give it a listen, here's the Sexy Sunday episode on my Naked 40 project that I talk about in the episode.
Weekly stories by email from Bonnie’s HERE
Connect with Bonnie: Instagram, Email (hello@bonnieweeks.com), Website
Listen to Bonnie's other podcast Sexy Sunday HERE
The music for this episode is Threads by The Light Meeting.
Produced by: Grey Tanner
As we near the end of the year, some questions are alive for me and I share them with you, along with some insights from a trip this week to a clothing-optional hot springs.
We explore the themes of letting go, having conversations with our pain, and how embracing uncomfortable spaces can expand us.
And if you'd like to give it a listen, here's the Sexy Sunday episode on my Naked 40 project that I talk about in the episode.
Weekly stories by email from Bonnie’s HERE
Connect with Bonnie: Instagram, Email (hello@bonnieweeks.com), Website
Listen to Bonnie's other podcast Sexy Sunday HERE
The music for this episode is Threads by The Light Meeting.
Produced by: Grey Tanner
Bonnie (00:00.714)
Hello lovely. I am gonna warn you from the very beginning here that I am probably going to encourage you to get naked before the end of this episode. So if you're already somebody who loves getting naked, especially in the outdoors, great, because this might resonate with you today.
We are currently in this space where the last week, right before we jump into the new year, where time gets a little bit warped. And this week I haven't had my kiddos living here with me since I have them a week on and a week off and they're with their dad. We swap on Friday nights. And so the kiddos are coming over today as I'm recording this. But this has, what that means is that this week has given me a little bit of wiggle room.
and different sorts of timing to lean in with myself and to lean in with my lover. And I feel like I have learned a couple things or found a couple things in my thoughts and in my experiences this week that are helping move me forward. So I want to share those with you today. And I think that they are really good setup for where we are headed into this next year.
And the first of this then to begin is that there is an outdoor hot springs that I went to over this week and it's like three hours away from me. So you know, it's a lot of driving just to go hang out in a natural hot tub and then drive back again, but something I've wanted to do for a while. So you know, I was driving to this hot springs and my lover is driving and
If you've been here for a sec, you know that, um, you know, that I last year, all of a sudden had a ton of pain in my left SI joint and in my low back. And, and recently in these past couple of weeks, it's been talking to me a little bit more. And I think in my continued effort of paying attention to what wellness is and how it is that I show up and how it's so much more than just one thing, right? Like, yeah, we can talk about yoga
Bonnie (02:19.922)
and do some yoga asana, like some postures. But wellness isn't just yoga. Wellness isn't just the food we eat. It's not just the sleep we get. It's not just the company we keep. It's not just the honesty that we speak out loud with. It's all of the things. And it's allowing yourself to be held. It's recognizing the patterns that might be habitual and learning how to switch them. And...
Anyway, so I continue to do this work of what is wellness for me. And I was having a bit of pain actually in the car as we were driving to the hot springs. And when I was deep in some pain, you know, like a year or so ago, I had a dear healer friend who is a chiropractor and works, especially with those who have wombs and are birthing parents.
and does some really kind of beautiful work. And she prompted me, she's gonna be on the podcast here soon. So it's Katie Kanda. And look up Katie Kanda if you're in Portland, I'm just gonna do shout out for Katie Kanda K-A-N-D-A. If you are a birthing parent and want support before or after, and anybody who has a uterus, she supports a lot of those folks. And so...
I have, I am postpartum by a lot of years. My youngest is 12, but I went to her and one of the prompts that she gave me was,
she was sitting next to me and she had her hand kind of on my hip and on my low abdomen and the other hand like on my shoulder. And this is towards the end of our session and she was like, you know what? I feel like a telephone operator right now. And I feel like your pain is trying to talk to you. And have you ever talked to your pain and asked it what it was trying to tell you?
Bonnie (04:28.634)
And I just thought that was a really beautiful sort of prompt and something that has stuck with me and something that we really could take around any sort of feeling in our body, right? It doesn't just have to be pain. It could be joy. It could be anger. It could be frustration. It could be bitterness. It could be peace, right? What are you trying to tell me with this feeling?
And have this conversation with yourself. And so I am in the car and feeling a bit of pain and I just closed my eyes and I talked to my pain. I said, what are you trying to tell me? I just had this little going inward moment and I'm headed to these hot springs and you know, going, doing the things in this space right before the new year.
Bonnie (05:28.726)
The message that I found in me was to let go. To let go.
And I think that's a beautiful message and metaphor of this time of year and the ways that maybe we have built things and done things and finished things. And maybe there's things that we hold on to too long because we're afraid or maybe we cause ourselves undue stress and anxiety over something because we have gripped it so tightly and we just need to open our palms.
There are so many ways to think about letting go. And it was this really beautiful reminder about that. And also how that plays out in the body, especially when you might have pain in your body, or if you're feeling an emotional state, if you're feeling stress and anxiety and fear, if you are feeling tired, if you are, like there's so many different ways in our body that we'll hold ourselves, and we're trying to hold ourselves together, hold it together, right? That's a phrase.
Hold it together, come on people, hold it together. Where what if we didn't hold it together? What if we said, actually, actually I am trying to grip myself into place. What happens if I actually set that down? What happens if I, kind of find a place of tension and relax that in my body, relax it in my jaw or my neck, relax it in my hips? Also, many of us are clenching our ass all the time. Like,
stop clenching your ass. And you might not even realize that you do because I know that sometimes I will give myself that prompt, I'm like, I'm clenching in my ass again, okay. Soften your butt cheeks, Bonnie. So maybe you will find that as well. And with my pain in my back, in my left SI, that's totally a piece of it. And I said to myself, I'm like, okay, yeah, self, let's just soften. Now let's soften--
Bonnie (07:33.89)
and let go. And I love the prompt that letting go leads to more room. There's a little bit of wiggle space. There's a little bit of freedom to move and I'm all about that.
So this experience, I'm driving to the Hot Springs, I'm having this car moment of letting go. And we get to the Hot Springs, and we had to wait to go back there because there's a limit and there was a person running it and pay 10 bucks. And so it's a little bit kept, it's not like a secret space, but you know, I...
loved how I was wanting to get naked. It's a clothing optional kind of space. And there were people who brought their families and kids and there's a couple teens there. And you know, the person who was kind of keeping things rolling there, he was, he was telling people, he's like, you know, this is a clothing optional space. You can do as you wish with your family, but I just want you to know that you will see naked people. It just kind of made me laugh because
He was just like, he's very honest about it. And I've thought about it, I'm like, would did I take my kids to a clothing optional space and get naked? And would I do that with my parents? And how would I feel with different people getting naked? And as I was hiking back in to the hot springs, I was thinking about these things and thinking that, yeah, my parents like, sure, I'll go get naked. Like it's nothing they haven't seen before.
I know with my kids, a couple of my kids might think it's more weird with their comfort level of nudity, but if it was like naked time, like I would totally be okay taking them somewhere where there was nudity and for me to get naked and to be the type of parent or person that does that. Do I know that not everybody's going to do that? Sure, but I would be okay with it and
Bonnie (09:45.798)
I think that's such a piece of what I'm trying to bring to the world. Now don't stop here in the podcast because you're like, wait, okay. Ba's Bonnie is trying to bring everybody naked in a hot tub to the world. Okay. So that's not what I'm saying. I am what I'm actually saying is that
those places that are uncomfortable, those places that we shy away from, that we grip around tight and say, I don't wanna look at it, I don't wanna talk about it, or that's not appropriate to talk about. My curiosity is to tap into it and say, why? Are we sure? And what else is there if we soften a little bit of our grip around that? And is there really a threat there?
And is it really something to be worried about there? And I know that not everybody will think like me, which is totally fine. And it would be very boring if everybody did. And maybe this gives you your own prompt of, would you get naked at a clothing optional hot springs with your children, with your family, with, I don't know, like name some and people. And let that be a prompt maybe for asking a question for yourself
You know, maybe when are you gonna go get naked at a Hot Springs? Because I have to tell you, going back there, got back in there and there were at least half the people were still clothed. And then there was some people that were havesies. Like there was quite a few people who were women who had their bottoms on and their tops off. And so there was a variety of clothing and then there was a slew of
of naked people, a couple naked children too. And very respectful, very, everyone was, I would say quote unquote appropriate. Everybody was friendly and respectful and nobody was taking pictures. Nobody, you know, we were just laying in some rock pools in the middle of the trees and we were just humans.
Bonnie (12:08.926)
And we were just so fucking small in these mountains and in this outdoor space. And we were just together and it was really beautiful. And I got there and there's people in all various stages of dress and undress. And I was like, well, I'm taking it off and got naked. And I mean, you walk around different pools, you can walk to the little river, like the little like stream and like dump cold water on yourself and then climb in the hot--
hot pools and so it was a delight.
Bonnie (12:47.47)
And I think it was, it's experiences like that where I give myself permission to do something new and to do something different, to give myself the opportunity to feel maybe something that I haven't felt before. These are the experiences that expand me and I am so interested
in that expansion and what I'm going to learn about myself, my capacity, how my perspective will shift and how I will continue to grow. Sometimes the things are terrifying and not very comfortable, but I feel pretty okay with nudity and I've created some things in the world. And actually, if you may have seen me talk about, if you're following me on social media, on Instagram in September, I...
created a project called Naked 40. And in the show notes, I will put a link to the episode on my other podcast. My other podcast is called Sexy Sunday. And Sexy Sunday is about sex and relationships, nudity, discovering self, and with this slant of sensuality, sexuality, and expression. And so I've recorded an episode with my lover who was a photographer next to me and creating that experience for 40 people for my 40th birthday
Bonnie (14:15.778)
there was nude picture making. And so there's an episode on Sexy Sunday where we talk about that. So I'll put the link in the show notes so you can go and check that out. And kind of we recapped like the experience and some of the stories and kind of thoughts and feelings from creating that project and work of art and something that changed my life. And so I'm very pro nudity.
And my kids know this and being in nature and in a space with all these people, there was a moment that, as again, my eyes closed, go inside moment where the largest pool, which was the hottest, was the biggest. Well, it was the largest, right? But there was a lot of people around the edges. And so there was a point where I just was kind of in the middle
because there was room in the middle and hanging out and I just closed my eyes and let the noise of everybody talking and the noise of the water become like background noise and I just was with my breath and with the feeling in the air of being in the mountains and I had this whole little moment of
it's going to be okay. Right? Like that's the phrase where you get to zoom out. And I've talked about zooming in and zooming out before and when there's anxiety of oh my gosh, I have so much to do and this needs to be done and we're going into this place and how are we going to manage all this? Right? And maybe there's some anxiousness right now for you of moving into the new year or if you're listening to this after moving into the new year that
wherever we're at in our lives, we can hold anxiousness and say, there's like this thing we have to let get going. And, and there's a gripping of, of sorts that happens and a worry. And what happens when we zoom out is that the worry and the anxiety is smaller than what we might think it is because we have zoomed in on it. And so it's full in our face and we can't see anything else. And so putting ourselves in places where we can zoom out
Bonnie (16:36.862)
and where then we can see a little bit bigger picture and say, ah, hmm, that's gonna be okay. And why am I being so anxious about this? It's a very small thing. How can I put this in a different perspective when I've let it, like come right into my face, I've put it there, how can I pull it out just a little bit more? And so I kind of had this moment when I was in this, this Hot Springs
where I was feeling some stress and pressures of different things that I'm creating and different stuff I need to do, right? Like the to-do list. And I thought to myself, is it really that big of a deal? Right? And this is where I landed with this. And it feels kind of funny to me because I keep repeating it. But I started, for some reason, the year 800 popped in my head.
Right now we are finishing out the year 2023. So we're in the year of the 2000s, right? The 20, like the 2000s, the 2100s, or the 20 hundreds. 20 hundreds, that sounds weird, but you get it. So 800, the year 800. I just started thinking about how there were people alive in the year 800. There were people alive in the year 800.
And right now we're in the 2000s.
Bonnie (18:06.682)
And that means that it is over 1,200 years ago that people were living in the year 800 and that there were people living in the year 800. And that means it's over 12 centuries ago. Now, my grandpa is 100 years old, still alive right now. He is a century old. There are people stacked on top of each other that times 12. Like,
It's so long ago, it's also not, but like it's so long ago, like those people that lived in the year 800, they went to bed worried.
Somebody in the year 800 had a to-do list that didn't get done for the day. Somebody in the year 800 worried about whether somebody else would like something or if they were making the right choice or if their children would be safe. They worried if they would find somebody to care for them and keep them safe and love them.
Bonnie (19:21.506)
These were real people. And all the people from the year 800 are now ferns
and gnarled roots of trees and
raindrops.
People are eagle screeches.
Bonnie (19:48.106)
and gazelles.
Bonnie (19:51.822)
They are puddles.
Bonnie (19:57.414)
they are the feel of wind. Those people are not here. And I had this moment thinking about people in the year 800 so long ago and the ways that they had to have gotten stressed and anxious about their things. It does not mean that we shouldn't have stress or anxiety. It doesn't mean that we should
shame ourselves because we feel different things. Now, it's not that, it's just that I think having these zoom out moments to say, you're not alone, you're not alone. And--
Bonnie (20:42.738)
and that maybe there's other things that we can focus on in some of those moments because
if you look ahead and do another 1,200 years, another 12 centuries ahead, we will be very gone, which is wild to think about. And how small we are in this Zoom Out experience. And so here I am naked in the woods with a whole bunch of other people.
I'm thinking about how small I am.
And, you know, ironically, like the gift of me sharing a podcast to the world in a way, where I have listeners from all over the world. And the opportunity for that at the same time where I'm talking about how small I am and yet you could be listening in a country very far away from me and the wildness of that. But I just know that
putting yourself in new spaces, in outdoor spaces, and getting naked, like truly get naked, go do something naked. And realizing how fucking small we are, it changes the perspective of where we're going and what we're doing. And if there's anything we need right now, it is probably that to be able to like sit with ourselves and be like, it's gonna be okay, it's gonna be okay. What
Bonnie (22:24.702)
is my body trying to talk to me and tell me about right now? What am I feeling and how can I zoom out from it? How can I wrap my head around what's happening in a way that feels productive and actually helps move me forward? So definitely get naked in nature. And as we were driving away, I was like, I want some pictures naked because they didn't take any pictures there. So we pulled up for on the side of the road. And again, as we were in the mountains, we're barely like left.
And anybody who was driving by was going to be, you know, people who had already seen me naked. So I took off my clothes. And my lover was making pictures of me in the middle of the road. And then there was a car that was coming by and I just stood by the side and I just waved at them and they waved at me because they were just up there naked also. I don't know what they were. We didn't learn anybody's names. There was people from all different countries there. But I just stood on the side that were naked and they were like
Yep, there's a naked person and it's making pictures on the on the road in the woods naked and alive. It makes me feel so alive.
And maybe it's because it's atypical. And I think that's part of why I would take my kids there, is because there's so many ways of living in the world. And in the United States and other countries, nudity is like trapped down and said, you know, that's bad. This is not what we do. And this is not appropriate. Where other cultures, that's not the case. And so why not be like one of those? Like there's not a wrong or right here. It's just different. And yeah, no, not a better.
Just different. So all this said, go get naked. Go get naked in nature. Go do something that you've wanted to do that sounds like a good adventure. And if it's not possible to do it this week, then I want you to calendar it out. I want you to look at your schedule and say, I want you to plan first, plan some play, because next year you need some play. So plan the play.
Bonnie (24:34.114)
Put that in there first and let everything else work around it because if you don't plan the play, then you're going to miss it. Because it's really easy to get lost in that to-do list and feel the anxiousness and like, oh my gosh, but you know what? The people in year 800 are gone. And I sure hope they planned some play and like had that be part of their days too. So plan some play, what's an adventure you want? I want you to put it on your calendar and I want you to make plans to do it.
Of course, there can be a variety of money investment and whatnot, but like this was an investment of literally just gas, a gas tank so we can, you know, drive. So choose your own adventure on the cost of course and of saving and not encouraging to do any sort of credit. Like just use what you have and go for an adventure. It does not have to be expensive to be to be impactful.
Bonnie (25:33.234)
As we are stepping into this space where we're creating some awareness and attention to how we're moving, and you're gonna plan to play and maybe get naked, and please tell me if you got naked and how it went and what you thought, what you learned, what you learned. I want to give you, I want to give you a couple questions to reflect on as you're moving into this new year.
And I want to give you these as a way to maybe add clarity to the direction that you are headed. This is not necessarily goal setting. You can take that and continue to spin it and do that, but that's not necessarily what this is. So I have three questions for you. You can write these down, go back to them. I want you to take like, even if you took five minutes and wrote about these, like this would be...
I think really impactful for your movement forward. The questions are, what do you want less of in this next year?
Question number two is what do you want more of?
And question number three is what are you terrified but excited to say that you want?
Bonnie (26:56.17)
Again, what do you want less of? As we create a little bit of space and we set things down, what do you want less of? Then it's gonna create more room, right? So what do you want less of? It could be family-related, relationship-related, self-related, business-related, home care-related, like so many things. What do you want more of? What do you wanna call in and say, thank you more, please? What do you want more of?
And what are you excited and maybe terrified to say that you want and to own that you want it. And even if you've never said it out loud, maybe you will write it down and say it out loud here by yourself.
And again, I could slant in all different directions of types of things.
Bonnie (27:55.282)
And maybe as you step into this new year, I often have a word of the year. I do not have my word of this next year. This word of my 2023 has been trust and to trust in the timing of things, to trust in my body, to trust in the healing journey, to trust in people and experiences and myself to trust. And that word stays with me.
That word is gonna be carried with me still. We're still gonna be holding that. So a layer on top of that, I'm not sure what it is for this next year. That's a part of my consideration right now too. So when I give you these three questions, perhaps you will find some sort of ideas as well of some themes that will help lead you to maybe your word of the year and what it is you want and want to make room for. And letting that help lead you.
And if your word is naked outside, I fully support that. Oh, loves. Thank you for being here with me. Thank you for listening to my story about naked hot springs time and the reflection of zooming out and the way that we are so small and yet make big impact. And.
Bonnie (29:23.526)
I know that things are bigger than me, but need me. And we can be the one little drop that begins big ripples.
Bonnie (29:38.17)
and in what ways are things from the year 800 still affected? Like we don't know, but they can't not be.
And so on that,
own your big beautiful voice. Own it. Share it. Pay attention to how you're feeling and what you want. And explore your willingness to go into places that are uncomfortable or to re-story yourself around ideas and perception and perspective,
especially as we step into this new year and have a new space to create in. It's a delight to be here with you as we are going to the new year, like happy new year. If you're listening to this, at some other time, because we were right before new year, happy new year. New year always begins whenever we wake up for the day. It's always another 365 days. This is another year, so.
Happy New Year always sort of applies, yeah? Go get naked, y'alls. And pay attention to it. Talk to you soon.